So as long as I have wanted a baby..(since I was 10) I have dreamed of having a full baby and being surrounded by my favorite aunts and friends and family members. Seeing lots of baby blue or pretty girly pink..with maybe a diaper cake and everyone rubbing my belly saying "oh your glowing" Getting wisdom of parenting advice while others tell me nightmare stories of their own labor stories. Then of course a few tears and a warm wishful toasts as everyone drinks champagne and I drink apple cider.
Yep! I have it down to the T!
Well, if Infertility has taught me anything, it is not to expect anything. So I am driving home with with my mom in the car..( I drop her off every night because we work in the family business together) and she says to me.."you know I have to say, in the Jewish Religion..Jews do not have the baby shower until after the baby is born".
I automatically get pissed off because back story: she threw a baby shower for my sister in law almost 2 years ago! WTH!!!
And we are not even Religious. Yes we celebrate The high holy days and hannuka..but really we do not follow any rules or traditions. There are a few things I have done that has been religious. My brother and I had our Bat and bar Mitva's- and before my paternal grandma passed away) my father's side of the family was orthodox jewish.kosher..and went to temple and really put a lot of effort into their Jewish Community in New York and Florida) she asked me to have a Rabbi at our wedding. My husband is not Jewish..so she felt it was important to emphasize the importance that she wanted us to be blessed by a rabbi.
Well..my mom said during the drive, I am not saying I do not want to throw you a baby shower, but it is bad luck. I said okay..mom..that is fine..I do not need one. I dropped her off, and I ate half a bag of chips and vented to my husband who was driving and just smiled at me and listened and his advice:
lets go get some ice cream. I got excited and almost forgot about the disappointing news of not setting up a nursery and having a baby shower.
So we are there at the ice cream shop and I turn to look over at the frozen yogurt section,...and there he is him and his wife the rabbi that blessed us at the wedding. I forgot to say, as my mom walked out of the car to go home, she told me to look up more about the taboo and find out why it is a taboo to not have the baby shower before the baby is born.
Well..what a coincidence..call it fate or a sign, god..what have you. I was delighted and flabbergasted! We greeted each other we announced we were pregnant and they said they would be delighted to bless the child and our home. I am so excited. But then I could not restrain myself. I had to ask. so I told them of the conversation I had with my mom and the rabbi said it was introduced when there was a high mortality rate and no testing to see if the baby is okay, So now it is just a superstition. It is to protect the parents from a horrible grieving process if the baby does not make it. They said the nursery just normally is not made up until the baby is born. Other than that..it is not in the law of the Jewish books,...it is just superstition..among mainly orthodox Jews.
So I called my mom and she was just as in shock that I bumped into the rabbi after our conversation. Needless to say..I am having a baby shower and I am setting up my nursery. I have that right..and I have been to the doctor and had ultrasounds..my baby is healthy and he will be coming home mid January.
So that is it: I am planning a baby blue theme with animals!