I am going to be a dramatic women for the next couple of days. I am a nervous wreck for my baby...I do not care if I have to eat nasty food..I just want my blood level correct so my baby is healthy. I have done so much. Sooo sooo soo much to have this baby..and now..I feel extremely guilty. I feel if I was not not overweight..it would be fine. The doctors warned me that I was prediabetic. I lost 35 pounds before the IVF..but now...here it is staring me in the face. I have to live with this and I have to have thoughts in my head that are only positive..because I want my baby Alexander to be healthy. I am typing this at work and doing everything I can to hold back these tears.
So today...I am going to my machine and learn to use it. Not looking forward to being a pin cushion again!
then tomorrow..I have a 9:30am appointment with a dietician.
Right now...I am just really upset.
