Monday, April 18, 2011

Fainted!! Graham Crackers Didn't Work

Yes, I fainted. I was doing so awesome. I fainted this morning when my blood was drawn. I know why the fainting happens. I do not feel like I have control. But, really it actually hurt. I got my blood taken at 7:30 am in the same place I got it drawn 5 days ago. And I have to go get it drawn in two days again. I hope they use another vein on my other arm next time. The nurse said she may have hit a nerve. I am not sure, all I know is it burned when she put the needle in and two hours later it still burned all around the area. I just feel really emotionally and physically drained when I faint. I am tired and worn out from crying. I was mainly crying because at this moment, I just feel out of control. I have these thoughts, like, how much more can I handle. I question my own strength. I want to be strong for myself, my husband and the child we are working so hard for, but there are moments during this IVF process where it is very irritating and slightly painful.  

I wish I had more to say, more inspiring cheerful thoughts..but right now I am just not happy. I just wish, I could fast forward. I have to remind myself to be grateful. I am grateful for the medicine that I have been taking because it is helping me create a dream of mine. This medicine that I am taking is creating the possibility of making a baby. I have to keep my eye on the prize. I am trying to make a baby.

I am pretty aware of the medicine..there are twinges and burning sensations in my lower abdomen and lower back. My boobs have grown a little as well. That is strange. My husband seems to be curious as well. I have also been crying a lot. I think it is the hormones, because I will just cry all of a sudden, and it is not just a little cry..it is going on for a while with lots of Alligator tears. And then all of sudden, done, no more crying. I don't think crying is a bad thing. It really is a soothing thing for me and I feel better after I cry. it is a release.

Also, I have been really paranoid about the whole Ovarian twisting. So, I have had my husband bring in all the groceries and I am walking really slow. My brother asked me to baby sit his 14 month little girl. I so want to, but I do not want to run and pick her up. I wonder if I am being too neurotic. I just do not want to take any chances. I love being independent, and spending time with my Niece, but I have to think about myself right now.

I wonder if any of you have had this dilemma?

9 comments:

  1. I'm sorry you had such a tough blood draw. I've fainted before, but ironically the more I get it done, the less of a big deal it seems to me. I had to have a blood draw every day for over a week with my cycle in January, and I don't even care anymore, even though it used to terrify me.

    Yes, the hormones do make us very weepy. I am the same way right now even though I am only doing a frozen cycle, I am still on lupron, estrogen, progesterone, etc.

    When I was at your stage in January, I took it VERY easy too. I walked slowly and didn't carry anything heavy. It is just too risky, so take the time you need to take care of yourself. We have every right to be a little selfish when we are going through IVF. Do what you are comfortable with and no more.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hopefully this was just a fluke draw, and your next one will go smoothly. You don't need that additional stress, so I feel for you!

    I was warned about ovarian twisting as well, and pretty much was as careful as you were. Take this time to rest, it's a great excuse :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Oh how scary to faint during a blood draw! I really hope that was a one-time thing, and doesn't happen again! And I agree with the others - take this time for you - take it real easy, and don't worry about doing much during this time. It's hard, but now is the time to be selfish! Glad to hear you're feeling the meds - all those twinges and reactions bode well to creating lots of eggs!

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hang in there.Its hard. Not long to go now.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Sorry you had that happen today. This is a tough thing to go through, no doubt. I hope things go better for you on Wednesday. Hang in there.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Oh, poor you! Hope that was a one-off for this cycle and the other blood draws will be fine. What day of stimming are you on now? I'm on day 2 and not feeling anything so far! Actually exhausted in the early evenings (5pm) but that started before the stimming so maybe it's the DR drugs? Thanks for the reminder about twisting.. I'll remember to take it easy :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am on stim day 4 tonight. I am really feeling the twinge and pulling. I am sure you will be feeling it soon. I am glad the website was helpful. :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. What a day for you. I'm sorry, it takes a lot of energy when it happens. Be kind to yourself and take it easy during this time when you need it.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Wow, that is very strange about the fainitng, and I can only imagine how scary it is to faint! I'm sorry having blood drawn is so hard on you - what a horrible extra complication to cope with.

    Dealing with being out of control is so difficult during this process. First there's the out of control feel you have for not being able to just make babies like 'normal' people, then there's the out of control feeling of having your reproduction and all your intimate bits governed by doctors and nurses with needles and scans and then of course the hormonal out of control that we suffer from all the artificial stimulation.

    I'm very sorry you're feeling down but you're doing so well, and I'm really hoping this cycle has good things in store for you.

    ReplyDelete